you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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