So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
