Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.