Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...

(703): View more from Virginia

oh

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(248): So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine... (703): oh http://tfl.nu/2rig

Replies (10) Good night (953) Bad night (3276)
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(253): View more from Washington

I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.

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(253): I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you. http://tfl.nu/clvu

Replies (17) Good night (2769) Bad night (823)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?

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(614): Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy? http://tfl.nu/swws

Replies (17) Good night (5468) Bad night (865)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.

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(202): Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology. http://tfl.nu/sp8t

Replies (32) Good night (10132) Bad night (1267)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back

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(732): she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back http://tfl.nu/8662

Replies (14) Good night (5098) Bad night (1312)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.

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(609): imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift. http://tfl.nu/z6oe

Replies (31) Good night (1532) Bad night (3988)
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(317): View more from Indiana

I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.

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(317): I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me. http://tfl.nu/s4ft

Replies (36) Good night (7318) Bad night (1641)
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(330): View more from Ohio

theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.

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(330): theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles. http://tfl.nu/gk69

Replies (29) Good night (7033) Bad night (1301)
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(407): View more from Florida

I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few

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(407): I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few http://tfl.nu/2coh

Replies (1) Good night (2325) Bad night (821)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.

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(201): Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium. http://tfl.nu/lfpo

Replies (11) Good night (4795) Bad night (877)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.

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(775): Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form. http://tfl.nu/2bqh

Replies (4) Good night (1618) Bad night (631)
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(720): View more from Colorado

We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.

(970): View more from Colorado

Oooh, he sounds pretty classy

(720): View more from Colorado

Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.

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(720): We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini. (970): Oooh, he sounds pretty classy (720): Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died. http://tfl.nu/8k1p

Replies (9) Good night (1116) Bad night (661)
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(+81): View more from

On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows

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(+81): On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows http://tfl.nu/nqax

Replies (1) Good night (606) Bad night (376)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.

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(570): I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me. http://tfl.nu/ca7c

Replies (7) Good night (659) Bad night (446)
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(410): View more from Maryland

The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.

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(410): The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day. http://tfl.nu/gmm1

Replies (4) Good night (558) Bad night (358)

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