You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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