MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
is that a dick in a sweater?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Randomize
