everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize