my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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