i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
