im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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