I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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