i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
