God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
