some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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