Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
