How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Terrible idea I love it
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
