Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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