bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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