brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
