The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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