I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize