Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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