My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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