youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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