I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
