your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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