super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
