My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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