every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
There r osticjed everywhere
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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