Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
is wine microwaveable?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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