It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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