I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
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..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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