I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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