Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Randomize