If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize