Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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