I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
