my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
