Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
