a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
