So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.