Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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