I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
