Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
