I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
