I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
40s are totally the cure
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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