Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
