i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
