she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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