Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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