he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
