My brain says no but my pants say off.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
